In his tenure as President of Basketball Operations Danny Ainge has shown to be anything but afraid to make the big move. Late Sunday night “Trader” Danny released free agent pickup Jarvis Varnado and promising 2nd round prospect Kris Joseph in a decision that forced many to think that Ainge was freeing up roster spots for a possible multi-team transaction*. Shortly after came a report from Comcast Sportscast New England’s A. Sherrod Blakely that the Celtics were interested in acquiring the extremely talented yet often troubled, Demarcus Cousins of the Sacramento Kings. The following will show the Planet Fun’s thoughts on the likeliness of this occurring, and if it’s the right move for the Boston Celtics.
By now, it is far from new news that Ray Allen has decided to ‘turn his back’ on the Boston Celtics to join the current NBA Champion Miami Heat. And while there is a great deal of outrage, there is a narrative in which his decision is defensible:
He returned from an injury to find his starting role occupied, and later was informed he’d been traded until complications prevented the Celtics from moving the 36 year old 3 Point King. Hurt, and feeling unwanted the ten time All-Star knew there was only one way to truly seek revenge on his disloyal employer – by joining it’s biggest* rival.
That particular narrative is both extremely oversimplified as well as shortsighted, but unfortunately, that’s the narrative Ray Allen chose to believe when he decided to team up with proffessional sports’ greatest traitor to feel wanted. A player who announced on national television, without regard to a city who worshiped and economically depended on him, and a Team President whose only loyalty is to his hair product. They’re the people Ray Allen turned to provide that loving touch.
It defies logic, but I’m afraid it’s logic that got us to this point.
On Monday, upon news that the NBA Player’s Union has disbanded in an effort to be able to sue the National Basketball Association, I’m reminded that no matter this large can ever be simple.
In the aftermath, in the face of what is increasingly likely a lost season, one question keeps coming up: What side do you blame? My answer is easy:
Everyone. I’m mad at literally every single person involved in this entire process.
For three long days, or approximately 4% of the length of time Kim Kardashian & Kris Humphries were married, I’ve stood by idly watching the Kardashian hate-articles fly: The articles slamming Kim for a scham marriage, speaking ill of her for ‘faking a wedding’ for profit and publicity, and talking about how miserable of timing this is when you consider the hot button topics that this marriage flies in the face of (a 10 million dollar wedding in a recession, and a ‘scham wedding’ when gay marriage is being fought off by people claiming it goes against the ‘sanctity of marriage’).
Which is fine, and valid points if true. But I can’t help escape the feeling that these opinions are being written by the ill-informed. In today’s world, we have increasingly gotten better at calling out ill-informed journalism. Villaifying the people who speak without really knowing the issues or the facts. Discrediting those who choose not to do their homework and speak freely based off of second-hand information.This applies to almost all fields; except the world of pop-culture.
Editor’s note: The following originally ran on FFPrep.com Which is a terrific Fantasy football website.
Oh Hi,
Come in. Why don’t you take a seat, Are you comfortable? Thirsty? No? Here, take this glass of water just in case you become thirsty.
Listen, I’ll cut to the chase – what I’m about to tell you is pretty serious, probably the most serious, life altering event in the history of your existence. I don’t want to sugar coat it; you’re not going to be happy. This is the type of news that can’t be delivered with a silver lining, because there’s no ray of sunshine in this nightmare.
A nightmare. That’s a good way to look at it, because I’m sure the thought has gone through your mind. You’ve woken in a cold sweat, shrieking at the top of your lungs until you realized the images you saw in your head were not real, even though the imagery was so vivid that you couldn’t help but have your doubts. Then you went for a brief walk to take some time to yourself to remind yourself that while the world can be cruel, it can’t be THAT cruel.
Unfortunately friend, it can be.
While its partially covered, your nightmare has become a reality:
Tom Brady has cut his hair.
Below I have constructed a tribute to Tom Brady’s hair. It is very emotional.
Yesterday marked the much anticipated release of ‘Watch the Throne.’Even after not really falling in love with ‘Otis’ (which actually isn’t on the album) and the previously released ‘H.A.M’ I couldn’t help but get excited about the release of a Kanye West & Jay Z album. It’s kinda like when your mother used to try to temper your expectations for Christmas: You’d tell her you get it, and that you’re 14 now and already have everything you’d need anyways, but deep down inside you’re thinking about how many dents you’re going to punch into your wall if you don’t get either a pair of Jnco’s or ‘Syphon Filter’ for the PS1.
My initial reaction to it was as if mom bought me a kite and a twenty dollar gift certificate to Aeropostale.
Yesterday I had a quick link inferring that Jay Z & Kanye West’s “Watch The Throne” ‘kinda sucked.’ Truthfully, it was a bit of sensationalism: I certainly embellished upon my thoughts in order to make “a funny.” My true, first opinion of the album was that it was disappointingly mediocre.
But upon further listens; ‘Watch the Throne’ is actually a very good album. But it probably does require a few listens. Mostly because it takes a little time to adjust.
This isn’t your typical Kanye West album: It doesn’t have 36 layers over 18 other layers, mixed with a string orchestra. There aren’t necessarily any standout songs, certainly nothing you’d hear regularly on Top40 radio. And when you’re listening to it, you don’t necessarily get that feeling that you’re listening to some grandiose, epic album.
What it is, is a top to bottom, quality CD that’s really enjoyable.
It’s actually kind of similar to ‘808’s and Heartbreaks,’ not musically but conceptually. It’s the kind of album you’re going to throw on and listen to. It’s meant to be listened to top to bottom, probably by yourself, in your car or with headphones on.
You won’t skip around, you won’t throw it on at a party, but you’ll probably enjoy the album a lot
——
Side Note: The one great thing about this album is the return of a more comedic Kanye West. The songs are a still a little ‘darker’, but he does have some great lines in there such as: Prince William aint do it right, if ya ask me / Cause if I was him I woulda (slowed down Rick Ross style) Married Kate & Ashley.
A few weeks back I had a bit of a writer’s conundrum:
While scratching my head for post ideas, I came across a subject that I thought I could write passionately and with a great deal of knowledge. And when you’re forcing yourself into writing 500 words on Maroon 5, that’s generally a good thing.
The problem is, I didn’t want to write it.
The aforementioned column was going to be, for lack of a better, less dark term, a eulogy for Conan O’Brien as a Late Night host.
Conan has always been a hero of mine. In a classic case of me over-thinking a silly subject, I was once asked to select two people to have dinner with. It took me a week. I knew Conan was one of them within five minutes of being asked*.
I’ve been watching Conan since his third season when I was eleven years old**. Before that, I had been exposed to his work on The Simpsons where he was credited for writing two of my favorite episodes ever, ‘Monorail’ and ‘Homer Goes To College’***.
His Late Night show, particularly earlier on, was nothing short of incredible.
Four nights a week, without any real guidelines, Conan presented his audience with some of the most hilarious, off the wall, and completely a head of its time comedy.
The deficiencies he had in his monologue were constantly made up by what are still some of the funniest sketches I’ve ever seen: Help With Your Heart, Dudez A Plenti ,Apple Picking with Mr. T , Andy singing “I’ll Make Love To You” , Conan’s trip to Houston , Conan Playing Old Time Baseball , and alternate channel Stachenblachen just to name a few (and these are literally coming off the top of my head). The Leno debacle ended up affecting me probably more than it should. I met the news with a mixture of anger and sadness, as to me it was everything that was wrong with comedic television: The innovative host who was shooting wax-Tom Cruise out of a cannon was being replaced by the one comic in the world who still makes Monica Lewinski jokes.
He left NBC with a series of stop-what-you’re-doing type of shows; In the proccess restoring his confidence, and gaining an edge I’d never seen.
Which is why the news about the TBS show was so exciting. I had assumed he’d return with a bite, coming back in what Bill Simmons refers to as ‘F-U Mode’: A desire to prove the people that doubted him were fools, and to show everyone why he’s a once in a generation kind of talent.
But that’s not how he came back. He returned with what came off as complacency. He was the host of a low-budget talk show, and that’s how he acted. As if what he did just didn’t quite matter to the degree that it once did.
The show started off fine, but since December it had been getting worse and worse and worse as the show seemed to get lazier and lazier.
That’s a problem for Conan, because he’s not the most skilled comic. He’s also not wired like David Letterman, who can just kinda show up, be David Letterman and be funny. He relies on a great deal of effort, mixed with his**** writing skills and charm. And when that’s not there, the show becomes a bit of a bore.
And this is where my original article would point out that I kinda got it. Conan, Andy and his writing staff are unquestionably older. They have families now, and I’m sure priorities have accordingly changed.
As a fan I understand the reasons for the change, but that doesn’t mean I wasn’t dissapointed.
But then, and I don’t know why, things changed. ‘Conan’ is kinda back.
His last few weeks have been a refreshing change. We’ve been met with some pretty hilarious moments:Conan at Comic Con , Mrs. Buttersworth: The Movie, Conan’s Car Pool , Super Dave Osborne Stand Up and his looks into Captain America (which has kind of surfaced as his TBS equivalent of the Walker Level) combined with mimicking ET host Billy Bush’s “Looks gooooood!” all stand out as exceptional comedy pieces. It’s the return of the effort from the man that many of us adore so greatly.
Maybe not stop what you’re doing stuff, but certainly very funny stuff in a style that you won’t see anywhere else.
And again; I don’t know what sparked the revival, but it’s been a welcomed.
And hopefully its this Conan, the one so many of us adore, who is here to stay.
Editor’s Note: This was written months ago on a different site. Since then it has become clear that extremely poor performance may’ve put some fuel into Conan’s fire.
———
*Charles Barkley was the other.
** With almost zero exceptions, literally every night in the summer and with some frequency during the school year. I’ve always had a passion for staying up late and eating Elio’s.
*** It’s believed that he had a great influence on many other episodes seasons 3-5, but due to certain writers guild regulations he’s still not able to speak freely about them.
The Leno debacle ended up affecting me probably more than it should. I met the news with a mixture of anger and sadness, as to me it was everything that was wrong with comedic television: The innovative host who was shooting wax-Tom Cruise out of a cannon was being replaced by the one comic in the world who still makes Monica Lewinski jokes.
PLANET FUN 